about a collin

SXSW

2010-03-17T02:28:00.000-07:00

We played tonight at SXSW and just got back home. It was incredible to have played somewhere new and to still have been received so well. What a great city for music. I love playing for fresh ears and doing what I can to make my music an experience for them. It is the most honest I can ever be.

I did enjoy some nice conversation with my car buddy, Anna. She is a great friend to have. I am lucky to have gotten to share 4+ hours with her learning about her and sharing about me.

It was just an excellent day.

I'm off to Florida tomorrow. Wish us luck and pray for our journey.

God Bless.

we are all in love

2010-03-16T03:47:00.000-07:00

New song. I am happy to say it is exactly how I want it to be.

I was looking for something, someone to call my beautiful. Someone who needed me like I needed them and who could pick me up when I’m down. Maybe I am a nothing. I could never be your beautiful, but you needed me like a cheap cigarette. Now you’ve used me up and I’m gone.

I guess that’s fine. I’m marked yours ‘til the end of time. You dragged me to your lips, now the ashes fill my mouth.
What I’m saying is, you know we’re all in love. Hear me say it now, because we’re all in love.

Then I looked up for someone, someone to call my beautiful. When I looked around, well, the answer I found was more hopeless than it seemed. Maybe I possess nothing that could ever change how this unfolds. I’ll forgive my lies when I say that you’ve tried every possibility.
I guess that’s fine. I have no regrets left to find. I chased what I had loved ‘til my love had escaped me.
We're all in love.
Something beautiful is all we seek. Something or someone to make our loving feel complete. I searched the earth and all I found were selfish girls and stupid boys all making selfish plans and shouting stupid words. Let's work for something beautiful beneath the sky. Let's work for someone greater, something higher, someone brighter, or someone worth the fight.
We're all in love.

The EP we are working on has a concept. It is my story. It is the story of my relationship from start to end. It is about how I loved, how I tried, and how I lost it at the end. It is entitled "The Resolution." How fitting... This is the last song of my story. I do not know what love the future holds for me. What I do know is this...

Then, I loved when I could, as hard as I could. Now, I love when I can, as hard as I can. The rest is up to God. I realized that last night. I can finally say my story has some kind of end for me that I am okay with.

Pray for me. I'll be at SXSW tomorrow playing my heart out. You can count on that.

Peace & Love

5 months

2010-03-08T14:54:00.000-08:00

I still miss her. It has been saddening the past few days. I have done my best to put some time and clarity into the way I feel and the way I have felt. I stand here today knowing without a shadow of a doubt that I loved her. The depressing part is that I think I still do. I do not know what the consequences of that are, but I know I hope she is happy. I wish I had her around still, but I know I can't. Bummer day.

Thanks Jeff, by the way, for my reliving of Sonic Adventure 2 Battle. You are some friend!

God Bless.

Studying

2010-02-21T16:03:00.000-08:00

So I am chilling out in Muldoon's for the day trying to study for the two electrical engineering tests I have tomorrow afternoon. It is not too much fun. I am not a study pro, nor will I ever be I think. This is the first time this semester I have needed to study. The first round of tests is always the worst.

Just when you thought protractors were confusing...

http://www.ece.msstate.edu/~donohoe/smithchart.gif

Welcome to my life apparently.

I am trying to be a great student, but my heart and mind are in many different places.

To my dear friend here in College Station:

You are awesome. You are always wanted around me. We will figure out our place in this world.

To my sister in Searcy:

Days move so slowly when you are in danger of losing someone you love. Just keep in mind, that no matter how slowly its moving, there will always be a tomorrow. You are strong. You are faithful. Keep it up. God doesn't show you gold just to give you silver.

To my friend in Dallas:

All I can keep saying is pull through. No one will ever be exactly where you are, but don't discourage. You have people in your life striving to pull you away from any darkness you find yourself in. Even if they can't pull you away, then they will stand next to you fighting it.

Thank God for good friends. I love you all.

God bless.

Courage

2010-02-19T01:10:00.000-08:00

I had an opportunity today to say what I meant in the best way possible. I am lucky to say I have succeeded. I believe with all my heart that God has been preparing me for that moment for the past few weeks.

Thank you God.

Thank you friends who have helped me overcome my fears.

Thank you JB for all the encouragement.

God Bless.

Healing

2010-02-16T08:07:00.000-08:00

I have been blessed recently by a good friend, Anna. She and I have been talking a lot about the struggles and fears that come with losing someone you love to life. Here are some things I have learned and been thinking about.

It struck me last night when Anna told me she was hoping that I would start healing. I am not used to this term lately because everyone else has given me such a different idea of this process. In the eyes of most other people, this lost relationship was nothing more than a bad habit, something I just needed to buckle down and move past. I think it was refreshing to hear that it is something bigger. My love and adoration for Sarah was something that accumulated over time. It was an honest love that had grown and blossomed into what I thought was a beautiful relationship. I loved without fear of loss and I figured she could do the same. The trouble is, now that it all has ended, I am left wondering among other things, how do I love again. It is not that I have someone in mind right now that I need to love, but my heart has literally no clue how to love with no bounds.

A different friend of mine recently told me about her dad and their family pet. The dog they had for years one day accidentally bit off her father's finger in the midst of playing with a toy. The dog was not aggressive or in anyway attempting to harm anyone, but alas, the finger is gone. I joked around with her saying that'd I'd give the pet away. Who cares about loyalty? He bit my finger off.

That's how the love thing feels. I have had it in my heart for so long, that I'm not sure I will ever be able to see it again without being afraid love is gonna bite my finger off.

With the dog, I would rethink every aspect of our relationship. Whether it was feeding, letting him outside, or especially playing again, I would be concerned for my remaining nine fingers' safety. I feel that love is something that is in your life everyday if you do it right. My love affects my friends, my family, and my responsibilities. If I had a problem loving someone that was so easy to love completely, then how the heck can I trust loving the people around me who aren't always looking at my best interests or the classes I'm going to that bore the crap out of me?

They kept the dog. When I asked my friend if her father thought twice about keeping it, she looked surprised that I asked. That dog was apart of their family. Why would it be any different now?

I guess I would like to maintain a similar mentality. Loving is something I have always been good at. Why should it be different now?

Sarah can not take that from me. No one can. Until I figure out who I am supposed to love whole-heartedly, I will continue to focus on the small loves out there. I will be a better friend. I will be a more passionate student. I will love my God the way he made me to.

PS - Another thing I've noticed. In my earlier writings, I would not say her name. Now that I am so certain that she is no longer in my life, I feel like I can be a little more honest and a little less protective.

Thanks for reading. Please continue to pray for me.

God Bless.

recap

2010-02-05T14:01:00.000-08:00

So I have been thinking today about the events that passed sometime in October with the angry bar owner and I think I have come to a conclusion about myself. I think I know where my confidence came from that night. I saw these innocent, good guys getting yelled at for something that wasn't at all their fault. Life had put them in a sucky situation, and they were just going to have to deal with it. I hate seeing that. That same feeling poured over me earlier that week and even in that instant. I knew that I wanted to be defended, so I defended them.

The feeling came over me this past week. I was left in the wake of a public humiliation via... drum roll please... Facebook! I know it seems shallow and stupid of me to even care, but sometimes there are those final straws in life that are capable of sending you over the edge. This was one of those final straws. If you know about Facebook, then you know it is notoriously good at humiliating. That's how I felt... humiliated, until my goofy friends all felt the need to digitally defend my honor. Instead of cheap words, they all hopped online and in a chorus, "liked" the offending update. This accompanied with goofy comments made my week! Isn't that ridiculous? I was so entirely happy to have been defended in such a small way by so many people around me. When Sarah and I split, everyone told me that I was too good for her or that she was a fool, but in all actuality, I needed/wanted someone to scream those words to her, not me. Some days I want the people around me to attack the things in life I fear the most. That's why I think I so eagerly jumped down the owner of Schotzi's throat! I wanted someone to take my dignity back for me.

I know what you may be thinking... it may have been a little immature on my part. This is probably true, but I think I needed to stop for one second and be the immature one here. I spent the past few months talking myself in circles about how I feel and act. It is about time for my heart to react the way it needed to when I was so focused on being the better person.

But anyways... here are some lyrics I've been working on. They are about everything I guess.

I guess I thought it’d be different, somehow I could cover it up. But the good guy in me hates the bad guy in you, and my dear, you’ve chosen your side. It’s not that this has to be impossible, but I think it should be tough for you. I know that this has to be harder on me because you cannot handle the truth.
So here I stand, miles away, screaming every possible way, and I’m praying you can hear me. I tried your doorstep. It’s far too cold. Somehow I stand a better chance here alone. From a distance, maybe you can hear me.

You did this so neatly. You had everything go as it should. You crossed your t’s and your I’s were there, but my dear, you forgot how this works. We never fit right on paper, and our words were never our best, so the promise you made when you tore this apart means nothing. We can never be friends.
Southbound on the highway, I’m going through every last thing you said through the phone lines that didn’t seem to work tonight. I thought just maybe, I’d get a chance. I was too late. You could not afford to wait. You had already gone to a new home, as if you’d been there all along. I thought just maybe I’d get a chance to tell you that I could still love you.

I guess this all seems fitting. My undoing will be these words. I’ve sworn not to care and to never be friends, but, my dear, this has never been worse. I promised myself not to tell you, but the blood in my heart won’t subside. So the truth is this… I still love you more than the day before you took my life.

And this one is unrelated and more recent...

The mountain top that you're stuck on can never hold you for long. I'll be your echo. I will answer ever cry for help as quickly as it's shouted out. If you need shelter, I'll be your shield. I will share in every pain and block the ones that will be too much.
You know I'll follow you anywhere whether it be through the darkness or it be despair. You can't do better if you never try. Sometimes it's hard to see the universe for all the sky. I'll take the worst of you on any day, and if you cannot sleep, please know I will stay awake.

As always, please keep me in your prayers. Thanks for reading and God bless.

I'm not sure...

2010-01-29T00:08:00.000-08:00

So this week has been a blast...

As the first official and full week of classes has run its course, I am once again left in a wake of despair. I am never prepared for the first full week if classes. Mentally, I just can't handle sitting in one place for too long. It kills me. I need to be able to change things up. I need to be able to say,

"Collin, you are doing well today, so let's go ahead and skip class."

Bad idea. I already know how that scenario turns out. So of course, I will sit through the hours and hours of dread to make it through the day.

Wednesday is a particularly busy day for me this semester. I have class starting at 11:30 until 8:45 tentatively. So I make it to my last class, which happens to be a lab, which happened to get out at 7:00 this week! Well obviously the next step would be to call my roomie, Spencer, to eat Chipotle across the street from campus. So we meet up, we eat, we leave, and as soon as we arrive at our apartment, I realize I left my backpack at Chipotle.

Now before we can continue, let's learn a little more about this bag and its contents...

This was a Jansport blue and grey mesh backpack I had from freshman year of high school... when mesh backpacks were cool? It contained a million defective mechanical pencils and pens, one working pen, two completely full spirals, and a binder with a free lab manual in it. Not much value there.

Anyways, I call Chipotle to see if they found it. They say no. Obviously I drove up there to check and see if it was there. Still no luck. I had nothing left to do other than to assume it was stolen. What a terrible start to my night. Especially since I was about to spend the next 4 hours tutoring people in Business Calculus. Long night. In the midst of all this though, the worst of it all happened. As I was leaving one students apartment, I was frantically trying to scroll through my contacts and dial up my next student to tell her I was on my way. The phone rings and a familiar voice answers the phone. Let's just say, it was someone I had been trying not to talk to. Someone who had hurt me pretty badly. Someone who I had done everything in my power to forget about. All my work until that point seemed useless. All I could do was be kind and pretend I meant to call just to say hi. I needed to pretend I wasn't miserable at the moment. I needed her to think I was happy. Luckily she bought it, and I quickly was off the phone. But it got me thinking...

For a split second, I was calm. Nothing else mattered. My backpack, my busy schedule, the fact that I couldn't find the exit to this gated apartment complex. It didn't matter. I wanted to call back and say I'd been thinking about her like crazy and I missed her. I wanted that calm in my life more often. Luckily, I didn't. Luckily, Chipotle magically found my backpack in their kitchen. Luckily, my week is almost over, and the weekend is here.

But here is this. I have remembered what I fought to forget. At what point does my memory cycle end? I have been looking for meaning in everything I do lately. I have done what I can to populate my life with friends, hobbies, and fun, but when it comes down to everything, they all can seem like distractions. When the attractiveness wears off, I find myself staring at my heart again. I am wondering if this well ever change, or if my life is just going to be one distraction after another.

I want to be someone who is purposeful and driven. I'm praying i find my purpose. Please pray for me also. I need it.

Collin

Good to be home...

2010-01-17T22:33:00.000-08:00

It's been far too long since I've been in College Station. It's just good to be home. It's always been great to have a place where you fit. A place where your role is set and secure. It's also good to be with my friends who I'm going to spend the next few months with. I will always love my home, but there is something to be said about my home here.

I'm thankful.

Collin

Is anybody listening?

2010-01-09T23:35:00.000-08:00

So... I have been trying to write music again.

It's been a pretty rigorous process too. I am so happy to be back in music in the writing sense because writing new music is like writing a new you. My songs are always grouped in someway as a whole. I can write fast songs, slow songs, sad songs, love songs, mean songs, and so on, but they will always be classified as my "old stuff" as soon as I write more. The "old stuff" can be important to me and meaningful but will always be my past, and the "new stuff" will be what people see me as... until I write more. It is an incredible opportunity but there is a problem... I hate the things I am writing. At least I think I do?

Everything I have written up to this point has had some strong tie to someone who is no longer in my life. So now I feel lost because I am writing to no one. I am writing to myself, and my art seems lost. I used to think that my songs were my way of communicating to her in a way that I was not mature enough to say or convey in any other way. Now I feel like my lyrics are just a physical reinforcement of what I already think with occasional rhymes. I cannot find the heart in my writing that I have had in the past because in the past, I was saying something to someone I loved.

So I had an idea... Maybe writing songs about other people in my life would change the motivation. Apparently that didn't work, because I wasn't emotionally attached to any of them enough to move me the same way. It is all seeming hopeless. Instead of a coping mechanism, the writing has forced me back into the feelings I've been hiding from for months now. I think the depressing thing is I am still singing to her. I am still hoping she hears me in a way that will change things. I am not sure what is worse... singing to no one or singing to someone who won't listen.

Anyways... here are some excerpts of what I've written thus far...

I looked up for something, someone to call my beautiful. When I looked around, the answers I found were more hopeless than it had seemed. Maybe I posses nothing that could ever change how this unfolds, so I'll ignore your lies when you say that you tried every possibility. I guess that's fine. I have no regrets left to find. I chased what I loved until what I loved escaped me.

Wait. Don't come into my life if you don't want to stay. Don't come into the light unless your dark is willing to fade away. Because you know I won't stop you from coming around, and you know I won't stop until the answer is found. East brings in the morning light, and it shines on your face. But before I can open my eyes, the west takes it away. You know I won't stop chasing the fading light, and you know I won't stop until you've blackened the sky.

You're nothing more than desperation. You're nothing more than air. You're a sure shot sign I've become complacent with everything I've come to fear the most since she's not here. You can check the walls and floors around you and realize I'm not there. I'm a bullet to the world around you that you can never bite because you don't have the guts or even care. Where are you now?

Those are 3 different songs, so I hope the lyrics aren't too awful. Thanks for reading and please keep me in your prayers.

Collin

What am I waiting for?

2009-11-30T10:27:00.000-08:00

So I have had a a lot of music filled weeks lately and it has me thinking...

I have this gift for music and this immense love of creation, and here I am striving towards a career that had absolutely nothing to do with that. I have been thinking a lot about it lately and with opportunities coming up all over, maybe I should start being more receptive to the idea. Maybe music is my calling or maybe its just my hobby.

I am going to be thinking and praying about this for a while.

Keep me in your prayers

Collin

I still exist...

2009-10-29T23:48:00.001-07:00

My friend, Jeff, says that if I'm gonna blog, I need to call it a "blag." Therefor, I am going to call this a "blag" at least twice more.

I have had a pretty dull week. I have come to a few realizations.

Turns out that my phone isn't really necessary anymore. I don't use it near as much as I used to. This is partially a good thing and partially a bad thing. You could say I am more attached to the people around me and the things I am doing this was, but I think I keep feeling a bit empty. This ordeal has not just been a loss of a significant other, it has been a loss of a best friend. This is a change that is less easily overcome by angst-ridden songs and ice cream binges.

On that note, I found a great new ice cream place called "Spoons." I got to have strawberry, vanilla, and cake batter frozen yogurt adorned with strawberries, blackberries, raspberries, and of course, CAPTAIN CRUNCH. The best part is you pay be the ounce. So in theory, you could have one morsel of every topping and a bit of every flavor and still pay the same as straight vanilla equivalent in weight. Unfortunately, this makes rocks the obvious ingredient to pass up on my way through the line.

Anyways, I am feeling a bit alone, and the world is not filling me up. I am trying everyday to rely on God and the things he's provided around me to get through it all, but I can't help but question my place in all of this and my plan. It all seems lonely from here, but I guess that is the scary part. There is a quote from a movie I watched this week that is surprisingly smart I thought...

Quit, don't quit? Noodles, don't noodles? You are too concerned about what was and what will be. There is a saying: yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the "present."

-Master Oogway (Kung Fu Panda)

Maybe I will try dwelling on what can happen today as oppossed to what can happen tomorrow or what has happened in the past. My life is a telling of my decisions and my reactions. I can change so much and so little at the same time. I will try some more this week to be a person who relies on God instead of one who fears the unknown.

Please continue to keep me in your prayers. I appreciate the time it took to read my "blag."

That was only once, so "blag."

God Bless

I did what???

2009-10-25T01:15:00.000-07:00

So last night was a night I may never forget. Let me give you some back story...

My band was booked to play a venue at North Gate with a couple good bands from the area. So we did our normal show routine starting about 8PM. We loaded up our stuff, drove to said venue, and then carried it all up a bazillion stairs. Sounds great right? Well turns out said venue does not have all the necessary components to support a live band or someone to run sound... strike one.

After about an hour and a half of live sound gymnastics, we were able to get it up and running for the first band. During the sound check, the venue employee informs us that we had to have someone run the door and take covers ourselves, but if we did, we got to keep all profits... strike two.

Second band gets on next. Turns out they could have helped us out a lot during the setup process, but chose not too. Finally they wrapped up their set and we got ready to play some music. We had a great show and had a lot of people come out. We get off stage, tear down the set, and begin to load up our stuff to leave. As we are carrying out the last bit of things, I see that the venue employee is yelling at the first band about money. It had been a rough night, so I decided to listen in. Apparently, the venue thought that they deserved half of the cover even though they had told us otherwise and we had paid all the bands and a sound guy... strike three.

The guys were getting yelled at about money, and I lost it. I am not sure why, but I felt some urge to defend these nice guys that didn't deserve the crap they were getting. I politely asked the employee what he thought needed to happen and then told him that they were out of luck and that he needed to explain to his employer that he can't change his mind because we actually made money despite the fact that he had not helped us one bit to put on the show.

Well... he got his employer.

This guy was huge! One of those guys who looks like he'd own a bar, and he did of course. He walked up the the group of guys and began to get in their faces to intimidate them. It was working, and it was completely unnecessary. I was about to hand them our cut and just leave the venue, but the switch flipped again. Next thing I knew, the man taller and thicker than me was in my face. My initial thought was, "I have never been hit before. Why didn't I prepare myself for this sooner???" Here is the weird part though. I wasn't afraid. I didn't budge. Here I stood amidst what might have been the most painful night of my life, and yet I wasn't concerned. All I cared about was how hard we worked to make this show happen, how hard we all played, and how much we didn't deserve to be treated like this.

The conversation that ensued, I can't remember one bit. All I remember is the feeling of watching myself from a third person perspective. Next thing I know, we are all outside with 100% of the cover. People congratulated me. They made jokes, told stories, and did impressions, but all I could think about was why I became that person for those five minutes. I couldn't figure it out. My buddy, Spencer, said I have a "rage" inside of me now that allows me to emotionally hulk out every now and then. He said he had it when his girlfriend dumped him, and it would get him to be super confrontational. Maybe that's what happened to me, but I think I have determined an alternative explanation. I am the kind of person that needs a cause. I need someone or something to fight for. Maybe it's the loss of what I've been fighting for that made me so rashly cling to something else to protect. I don't know exactly, although I think I can channel this to be a good thing.

My good friends, The Canvas Waiting say this...

"I would like to die a martyr, but some days I don't know which side I'm on. So give me a cause and I will go and start a war. Give me a gun, just tell me who this bullets for. You can bleed me dry even if it takes all night."

Then this morning in church we had a good lesson over the introduction to Ruth that I though correlates. When Naomi is trying to convince Ruth to leave her and seek protection with a new husband and new gods, Ruth says this...

"Do not urge me to leave you or turn back from following you; for where you go, I will go, and where you lodge, I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God, my God. Where you die, I will die, and there I will be buried. Thus may the LORD do to me, and worse, if anything but death parts you and me."

My task this week is to find my cause. Maybe after last night, I can stick up for others and myself better. I have a new confidence that I didn't have until now. I'll keep searching.

Please keep me in your prayers and thanks for reading this.

God bless

What's next?

2009-10-23T00:41:00.000-07:00

It's been about 239.5 hours by my count since my relationship status for the past 32 months has changed. I won't go into too many details but let's just say it was seemingly out of nowhere and while the bittersweet taste of Taco Tuesday remained in my mouth. More than anything taken out of my life, I felt like I was filled to the brim with questions I didn't know how to answer. Why? Why tonight? What do I do now? What do I do tomorrow? What do I do when I'm happy? Who do I call when I'm sad? Why does the world always leave me like this? Do I write music? Do I write letters? Do I post an awful Facebook status? How do I make her feel as hurt as I am? Do I wait for her? Do I try and change her mind? Where can I go from here?

I felt embarrassed. I felt like Galileo must've felt after he his heliocentric universe was rejected. He was sentenced to house arrest for 10 years until he died in 1642 for saying the sun was the center of our universe. In 1992, 350 years after his death, the church issued an official apology for the way he was accused and punished. Is that how my life will be? Will my resolution come too late?

All I could do was pray tomorrow would be better, but tomorrow only brought more questions and more problems. For example, do I shave myself a Hitler mustache?? I don't know. I seriously debated it for some reason. Why did I identify with him of all people? Do I dress nicely for the day? I figured out on the bus ride to school that the cliche scene from every movie, when all the break up songs play everywhere, is an actuality. I found myself thinking, "Why Clint Black? WHY?!" Then I drifted off the a scene from my favorite girl movie, Win A Date With Tad Hamilton. There's this line about great love and what happens when someone looses that. The person closes the book on that love and finds the one that they love second best. Do I begin my search for the one I love second best? Do I settle for the one who makes me almost as happy? This is the question that bothers me most? Is this where life forces me to settle? Is this the spot where my hopes and me expectations are thrown away?

I don't know.

There are so many seemingly rhetorical questions that I feel so uneasy about leaving unanswered.

All I know is this. God is good. He has blessed me with a support system that I cannot begin to understand or deserve. While I remain broken and defeated tonight, my God remains strong and everlasting.

"In my darkest night, you brighten up the skies. A song will rise. I will sing a song of hope, sing along. God of heaven, come down, heaven come down. Just to know that you are near is enough. God of heaven come down, heaven come down."

Thanks Robbie Seay.

Thank you everyone.

Please keep me in your prayers.

God Bless

FML

2009-03-25T22:35:00.001-07:00

Big week ahead... just thought I would leak that into the World Wide Web so I can convince my girlfriend days from now she never reads my blog :)....

Cant spell "donwelt" without "let down"

2008-06-02T20:55:00.000-07:00

So i am the king of let downs lately...

I can single-handedly run out of gas, be late, loose my debit card, forget a phone call, skip a chore, and still somehow be without a job. Sometimes life is full of let downs you can or can't avoid. I have found myself now more than ever, drawn to let downs and to those of others around me. It is sooo easy to see someone for a let down or a mistake in life and then shut them out accordingly. We can see a let down in someone and totally focus out all their good. Whether it be a good intention to a loving heart, I have now decided to love like I'm suppossed to and called to. "Love like a magnet!" I've heard and seen. Love your polar oppossite: something that exists to be exactly different. In nature, + goes to - and - to +. In this world, I am called to love those who hate just like Jesus lived perfectly for those who live everyday flawed. Love like a magnet. That is my call tonight.

things i dont like

2008-04-24T21:40:00.000-07:00

things i don't appreciate in life...

improperly sized pictured in relation to their actual size (ie. squished pictures)
turtle necks
any other clothing item with an animal's name in it
disease carrying animals
the way my sister dresses her self
bugs
misrepresented ebay items

thanks

the beginning of the end

2008-04-24T21:03:00.000-07:00

It has been brought to my immediate attention that my quick-wittedness and intelligent conversation has been noticed and should be brought to the world wide web in attempt to share a piece of Collin with the English speaking world. I agree with this general opinion and saw it fit to create a free blog that the world can see. So I signed up and chose a layout that is striking similar to my girlfriend's. (SARAH SHIVE!!!) It seemed to be a successful layout for her... (TWSS) Hope you like it! (And hopefully this will be more popular than my xanga.)

So here is a little bit of insight into my current life...

I am currently viced by the following things:

SCHOOL
WORK
STUDYING
MUSIC
MMORPGS (google it)

I am going to work backwards here so hang on.

I am afraid the last one is currently the worst and I have somehow once again fallen into the trap of online games. Don't worry though, once I get my warrior to level 50 I think i can return to normal life.

I am also currently playing around in a band. Its fun. Kind of a vice.

Studying? I'm not sure why I put that.

Work? I teach a million little underprivileged K-4th graders that are pretty cool. However, I do not think I have ever been more criticized, noticed, idolized, and flattered at the same time to a greater extend in my entire life. These kids notice everything about me immediately and then immediately comment on how bad it looks on me. I swear I get more grief about my hair than my mom and my girlfriend (SARAH SHIVE!!!) combined. Also, I wear a pair of bright red NIKEs, (which they pronounce with a long "i" like it should be pronounced so I might be doing a good job) and they always always always ask me how much I payed for them and that it was too much because they got a friend down on 6th street that could hook me up. I always say I payed more than I really did so they can think I'm cooler than I am. I think I am definitely moving up the student worker ladder though. There is talk of promotion. Good news is I can write whatever I want here and the kids will never be able to read it...

Finally, school is the devil. 'Nuff said.

Alright. I think i have sufficiently written a blog for you.

Thanks for reading it!!!